Saturday, August 21, 2004

Today's Brag

I am a fountain of spurious logic
a millpond of shallow insight
and a raging torrent of vacuous pleasantries
and I don't wear plaid!
What woman WOULDN'T want to marry me!??!
with my 'pantelones de fuego'
and my 'Sombrero de la Noche del Chupacabra'!
I am the Ricardo Montalban of unplanned sexual encounters
the James Earl Jones of drunken blind dating
and I have TWO viable psuedonyms!
AND a variable scale breast pump!
in lime green and fuschia!
FEEL MY AWESOME MINIMAL MAGNETISM!
bitch.

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