I kicked my neighbor because someone offered me $1,000,000.00

Pick the month you were born:
January--I kicked
February--I loved
March--I smoked
April--I dry humped
May--I choked on
June--I murdered
July--I did the Macarena with
August--I had lunch with
September--I danced with
October--I sang to
November--I yelled at
December--I ran over

Pick the day (number) you were born on:
1-------a birdbath
2-------a monster
3-------a phone
4-------a fork
5-------a Mexican
6-------a gangster
7-------my cell phone
8-------my dog
9-------my best friends boyfriend
10-------my neighbor
11-------my science teacher
12-------a banana
13-------a fireman
14-------a stuffed animal
15-------a goat
16-------a pickle
17-------your mom
18-------a spoon
19-------myself
20-------a baseball bat
21-------a ninja
22-------Chuck Norris
23-------a noodle
24-------a squirrel
25-------a football player
26-------my sister
27-------my brother
28-------an IPod
29-------a permanent marker
30-------a llama
31-------a homeless guy

Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White------because I'm cool like that.
Black-------because that's how I roll.
Pink--------because I'm NOT a homosexual.
Red---------because the voices told me to.
Blue--------because I'm sexy and I do what I want.
Green------because I hate myself.
Purple------because I'm cool.
Gray--------because I was drunk.
Yellow------because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars.
Orange----because I hate my family.
Brown-----because I was high.
Peach-------because I love oatmeal.
Other-------because I'm a ninja.
None------because I cant control myself.