Wednesday, November 23, 2005


The Legend:

In the mid-eighteenth century, hunters in the Ochamchir region of Georgia (a Province of Russia on the edge of the Black sea) captured a 'wild woman' who had ape-like features, a massive bosom, thick arms, legs, and fingers, and was covered with hair. This 'wild woman', named Zana by her captors, was so violent at first that she had to spend many years in a cage with food being tossed to her. Eventually, she was domesticated and would perform simple tasks, like grinding corn. She had an incredible endurance against cold, and couldn't stand to be in a heated room. She enjoyed gorging herself on grapes from the vine, and also had a weakness for wines, often drinking so heavily she would sleep for hours. As Colin Wilson points out in The Encyclopedia of Unsolved Mysteries, this is likely how she became the mother of many children to different fathers. These children usually died when she tried to wash them in the freezing river, a mistake that is understandible if she expected the children to have her own resistance to cold; but being half Homo sapiens, they just froze. The villagers just started to take her children away from her and raise them as their own; unlike their mother, the children developed the ability to communicate as well as any other villager. Zana died in the village about 1890; the youngest of her children died in 1954. Her story was researched by Professor Porchnev who interviewed many old people (one as old as a hundred and five) who remembered Zana, as well as two of her grandchildren. the grandchildren had dark skin and a Negroid look, and the grandson, named Shalikula, had jaws so powerful that he could lift a chair with a man sitting in it.

Stubblefield's Wireless

The Legend:
On the campus of Murray State College in Murray, Kentucky, there is a stone memorial which commemorates the day in 1902 that Nathan B. Stubblefield first publicly displayed a wireless means of transmitting voices between two points. Stubblefield’s wireless telephone was first demonstrated in 1892, years before Guglielmo Marconi developed his wireless telegraph; but that had been a demonstration for just one man, one Rainey T. Wells. Stubblefield, a farmer and telephone repairman living in Calloway County, Kentucky, claimed he could send messages through the air without wires, a claim which attracted a huge crowd of spectators to the front of the Calloway County Courthouse in Murray on January 1, 1902. At points about two hundred feet apart on the lawn, Stubblefield and his son Bernard had set up two boxes that were not connected in any visible way. Each box was about two feet square and contained a telephone, through which Stubblefield and his son talked as if they were standing next to each other, their voices being perfectly audible to the crowds gathered around each box.
More of the story
The rest of the story

The Mystery of David Lang

The Legend:
On the afternoon of September 23, 1880, on a farm just a few miles outside of Gallatin, Tennessee, a remarkable event was witnessed by five people. The farm was occupied by farmer David Lang and his family -- his wife, Emma, his two children, eight-year-old George and eleven-year-old Sarah, and their household servants. On that afternoon, the children were playing in the front yard, when Mr. and Mrs. Lang came out of their house and Mr.Lang started across the pasture toward his quarter horses. As Lang was crossing the pasture, the horse and buggy of the family's friend, Judge August Peck, came into view on the lane in front of the house; the children stopped playing, as Peck always brought them presents when he visited. Both Mr. and Mrs. Lang saw the buggy, and Mr. Lang waved to the judge as he turned to walk back towards the house. A moment later David Lang completely disappeared in mid-step. Fully witnessed by his two children, his wife, Judge August Peck, and the Judge's traveling companion (the Judge's brother-in-law), David Lang had just suddenly ceased to exist; understandably, Mrs. Lang screamed. All five witnesses ran to the spot they had last seen David, but there was nothing to hide behind or under; the field contained just grass. The adults quickly searched the field to no effect. By this time, Mrs. Lang was becoming hysterical, and was taken back into the house as neighbors were called with an alarm bell. By nightfall, all the neighbors were involved in the search, and, by lantern, they checked every foot of the field, stamping their feet to try to detect any holes that David might have fallen into. Nothing was found. In the following weeks, Mrs. Lang was bedridden with shock; all the family servants except the cook, Sukie, left; and curiosity seekers were chased away from the farm by the local authorities. The county surveyor confirmed that the field was on perfectly solid ground, with no caves or sink holes. Months after the occurrence, in 1881, Lang's children noticed that the grass at the site of their father's disappearance had grown strange and yellow, and formed a circle with about a fifteen foot diameter. Sarah called to her father, and, seemingly as a result, both the children heard him faintly calling for help, over and over, until his voice faded away. Mrs. Lang never fully recovered, and there was never a funeral or memorial service for Mr. Lang. Mrs. Lang eventually left the farm and allowed Judge Peck to rent it out, with the exception of the field in the front of the house. That pasture was left untouched as long as she lived.
Variations on the story
The Rest of the Legend
The Rest of the Story
Excellent Notes on the Mystery

The Canvey Island Monsters

The Legend:
On an November day in 1954, some citizens of Canvey Island, Britain, were said to have found a bizarre looking animal in the shallow water of a beach.
Those who found the dead thing dragged it up onto the sand, covered it with seaweed, and ran to tell the authorities; the local authorities contacted the federal authorities, and the federal authorities responded by sending two zoologists. These two gentlemen examined and photographed the corpse, then admitted they had never seen anything like it.
The unknown creature appeared to be a marine animal, but with feet and legs it could walk on if it chose; standing upright, it would have been about two and a half feet tall. The feet had five toes arranged in a 'U' shape, with a concave arch. the creature also had a thick, brownish-red skin and a pulpy head with two protruding eyes.
The body was cremated by the zoologists, who then left without making a public statement about the corpse.
On August 11, 1954, the Reverend Joseph Overs was walking along the beaches of Canvey Island a couple of miles from the site of the corpse's discovery, when he ran across a second body floating in a shallow tidepool. He contacted the local authorities, and they, once again, sent for expert help.
This new body was not only taller than the last -- four feet tall, standing -- but was in overall better condition too. The specialists stated that the body weighed about twenty-five pounds, had two large eyes, nostrils, strong, sharp teeth in its mouth, and gills. Its skin was pink and tough, like the hide of a healthy pig. Like the corpse found before it, the new body had two legs and feet, the feet possesing the odd toes arranged in a 'U' shape with a concave center.
Some theorize about a possible connection between these odd creatures and the incident of Feb 8, 1855, when a strange line of 'U' shaped tracks appeared in the snow of southern England

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Christopher Walken for Presidaent

OH HELL YES BITCHES!!!! NOTHING could be more AWESOME than a creepy nutbar like our beloved Christopher Walken running our Nation! I swear to GOD I will vote for no-one else if he actually runs. Period. End of story.
Check out this links to his campaign website:
Click here for also

Also be sure to take this Walken for President Survey

AND download the AWESOME poster to show your support HERE. It's a .pdf.

T-Shirts and Bumper Stickers for Christopher Walken

Hell yes there's bumper-stickers and T-shirts! My favorites are:

this one and this one and this one and this one as well. And don't forget this one.

Click on the title of this post for the full cafe press listing of Walken products.


Cat Enema

A friend of mine was just talking to a friend about giving a cat an enema the other day. That sounded like a totally madcap plan to me so I looked it up on the internet and here's the awesome webpage I found:

Click Here

Monday, November 21, 2005

I kind of miss Max Headroom

Yeha, I know. It was SOOOO stereotypically '80s a phenomenon. Like the Band Sigue Sigue Sputnik and swatch watches. But Dammit, the TV show was occasionally GENIUS! Not always, of course. Like all TV shows, it could suck. But it was at least different and innovative in it's time. It deserves another look. Viva Max Headroom! Viva Network 23!

How Much Natalie Portman is too much Natalie Portman

that broad should die in a fiery car-wreck.

SVEDKA - vodka for sexy robots

Well check this ad campaign out. New York-based agency Amalgamated has launched a new ad campaign for Svedka vodka which introduces the futuristic, party-going, fembot Svedka_Grl, built by the famed Stan Winston studios, and brought to life in print, outdoor and OOH, to brand Svedka as the vodka of the future. With the campaign set in the future, this give Svedka the ability to say anything they like including headlines such as "Svedka. The choice of the stem cell baby boomer generation in 2033, "Svedka says 'thank you' for making the gay man's gene available over-the-counter in 2033" and "Voted #1 vodka of 2033. Goes great with A $450 pack of cigarettes." Go check out their site, from the intro you'd think it was porn, but fortunately it's not.

I LOVE this kind of crap!

Ugly Nipples? The Japanese Liberty Company asks "Do you care about having beautiful nipples while playing around with boys? If you do, their nipple lightening cream is the thing for you. Unsightly brown nipples will be a thing of the past!

Pepee.Used by actors in japan to make their genitals glisten when making porno films. Source:Colors Magazine.

The Ultimate Personal Hygeine Product. --feces odor tablets. Another Japanese innovation, these pills promise to make your excrement completely odor-free in three days of use. "...people must be responsible for their odors." says the bottle. 600,000 bottles sold in the first six months, according to Colors Magazine (no. 18, Jan. 1997)